Just Deserts

The Rev. Brad Sullivan
Lord of the Streets, Houston
March 8, 2026
3 Lent
Exodus 17:1-7
Psalm 95
John 4:5-42

Don’t you just love it when your enemies get what’s coming to them? It’s like a delicious meal of deserved justice served with vengeance pie topped with self-righteous ice cream. It’s great. I love it when the bad guys fall and the really terrible people get exactly what they deserve. Enemies getting their comeuppance makes my little black heart sing. 

Then, the rest of me starts feeling pretty rotten, actually. That part of me that sings at other people’s misfortune ends up making the rest of me rather sick. Rejoicing at my enemies’ downfall may feed my cold little black heart, but it feeds my heart poison and grows in me like a cancer.  

It’s said that we are what we eat, and that is true of our spiritual food as well. Junk food and desert taste great, and when that’s all we eat, our bodies suffer. They stop working well. We end up with diabetes, and cancer, and heart disease, and even depression and anxiety can get worse from a bad diet. 

When we feed our hearts and souls with junk food, our hearts and souls become unhealthy as well. Vengeance, delighting when our enemies are hurt, that’s like really bad junk food for our souls. Think about what that diet really looks like: anger; rage; happiness that others are hurting, that’s cruelty. We can’t really be healthy and happy people when we feed ourselves on cruelty. We can’t be healthy and happy people when we delight in people’s suffering, even the suffering of our enemies.

See, the more we eat of people’s suffering, the more we want that food, which means we end up wanting people to suffer. So, even though our enemies might deserve suffering, when we delight in their suffering, we end up becoming cruel people.

Another problem with delighting in our enemies’ suffering is that we let ourselves focus on them, rather than ourselves. If they are bad and are getting what’s coming to them, I don’t need to look at ways I harm people. It’s still there, though, festering and eating us up from the inside. So, it grows in the dark, like mold, like fungus, rotting us from the inside. 

So, Jesus offers us different food. When he met the woman at the well, he told her he would give her water welling up within her to eternal life. Then Jesus talked to his disciples, telling them that the food he has to eat is doing the will of God. 

Well, what was the will of God that Jesus kept doing throughout his ministry? Healing people. Healing communities. Showing people a better way than the way of vengeance, a better way than the way of fighting and being against one another.

When the woman at the well asked Jesus which mountain was the correct one to worship God, he told her, neither was the correct mountain. The time is coming, Jesus said, when people will worship God neither on one mountain or the other, but they will worship God in spirit and in truth. 

So, what’s with the two mountains? They were the mountain on which the temple was built in Jerusalem and mount Gerizim in Samaria. The people of Israel and the people of Samaria were bitter enemies, so the argument over which mountain was the correct place to worship God was really an argument about which people God loved and which people God didn’t love.

So, when she asked which mountain was the best mountain, Jesus told her that folks would worship God neither on the mountain in Samaria, nor the mountain in Jerusalem. Instead, people would worship God in spirit and in truth. That sounds to me like all people get to worship God, regardless of which nation you belong to. That sounds to me like no more quarreling over whose mountain is correct, and if they stopped fighting over which mountain was correct, then they’d no longer be enemies. They’d no longer delight in one another’s suffering 

The food that Jesus offers is for each of us as individual people, and the food that Jesus offers goes far beyond individual healing. Jesus offers food that grows into healing among communities and even healing among nations. A community and a nation full of peaceful, loving, compassionate people is a community and a nation that will spread that same peace, love, and compassion to others.

Now, this is not about turning a nation into a Christian nation. Jesus wasn’t preaching to kings and rulers. Jesus wasn’t calling for a religious conversion of governments. Jesus wasn’t talking about forcing his way on others. Jesus was speaking to a woman at a well and to his disciples. Jesus spoke to the masses, to the people. Jesus met with religious leaders. Jesus wasn’t taking over a nation’s government to force change from the top town. Jesus healed and taught people the way of love to change lives and communities from the ground up. That’s things grow after all, from the ground up.

The food that Jesus offers feeds us in ways that lead away from bitterness, anger, and cruelty and into peace, love, and compassion. The food of taking delight in our enemies’ suffering, decays our bodies and souls, making us bitter, angry, and cruel. The food Jesus offers feeds our bodies and souls with eternal life, making us peaceful, loving, and compassionate. 

A community and a nation full of peaceful, loving, compassionate people is a community and a nation that will spread that same peace, love, and compassion to others. That peace, love, and compassion doesn’t spread through force feeding it, but by offering it and living it. When Jesus offered this food & water to the woman at the well, she wanted it. 

She ran to tell others to come and see a man who, “who told me everything I’ve ever done.” All Jesus actually said was that she’d had five husbands and the man she was with wasn’t her husband. Rather than dismissing this woman as sinful for having five husbands, let’s ask ourselves, “Why?” Only men could sue for divorce, so she hadn’t left her husbands; they had dismissed her. Why? 

Well, we don’t really know why five husbands had all sent her away, but we can guess that it left her feeling hurt and ashamed, probably bitter and resentful too. It could be a shameful thing to be dismissed by one husband, others wondering, “What’s wrong with her?” She’d been dismissed by five, so it’s a good bet she felt deep shame, like she was no good and unlovable. 

Then, Jesus talked to her, not like damaged goods but like a fully important, beloved human. “If he only knew,” she probably thought. Then, she found out that he did know, and he wasn’t shaming her or treating her like a lesser human. That was healing for her. That was the food and water Jesus offered, welling up in her to eternal life.   

The woman went from eating the bread of shame, bitterness, and resentment, to eating and drinking the love of God, the eternal life given by Jesus. Peace, love, and compassion was the food Jesus gave her, revealing the truth of her life, so she was no longer bound by it. There she was, fully exposed, and God was still calling her beloved. That’s being naked and unashamed, as we were created to be in Eden, in the beginning.

From there, the woman spread his message to others, bringing them to Jesus so he could feed them as well, the food Jesus offers growing from the ground up. That what Jesus calls us to do, to offer the same bread and water of peace, love, and compassion, to offer the same healing and eternal life we have be given to others. We’re reminded again and again to stick to this diet as well. 

As much as delighting in our enemies’ downfall is juicy and delicious (and it is delicious), it is also cancerous, harmful food which rots us from the inside out. Set aside that food. Offer it to God. “Here, Lord, accept my offering to you of my anger, fear, resentment, desires for vengeance. Accept my offering to you of the cruelty in my heart. Then, please feed me with your peace. Feed me with your love. Feed me with your compassion. Amen.”

The Beautiful Sunset of Life in the Kingdom of God

The Rev. Brad Sullivan

Lord of the Streets, Houston
October 27, 2024
Proper 25, B
Jeremiah 31:7-9
Psalm 126
Mark 10:46-52

Anyone ever ask for help, only to be ignored by others? Anyone ever ask for help and been silenced by others, told to keep quiet and to stop being such a bother? Anyone ever been made to feel ashamed for asking for help? That was the story of Bartimaeus, the blind beggar who called out to Jesus. “Have mercy on me,” he cried. “Oh, do shut up!” The people responded.
 
The crowd had contempt for Bartimaeus. Maybe because he was blind, they thought he was a sinner? Maybe he smelled bad and looked weird? Maybe they just didn’t want to be bothered by that rather annoying blind guy who was constantly begging and therefore constantly reminding them that they had plenty to be able to help him and were too self-absorbed or too fearful to do so? Perhaps they wanted to protect Jesus from that same annoyance and mild guilt that they felt? “We’re here doing religiousy godly stuff with a religiousy godly guy, and you’re just wrecking it Bartimaeus; go away.”
 
Whatever the case, Jesus didn’t share the crowd’s contempt for the blind beggar, Bartimaeus. Instead, Jesus invited the crowd to be a part of Bartimaeus’ healing. “Call him here,” Jesus said to the crowd, giving them the chance to repent of the contempt they had toward Bartimaeus, speaking to him with invitation rather than pushing him away. So, the first healing Jesus gave Bartimaeus was to have him be one with the people around him again. Then, as one with the crowd, Bartimaeus came to Jesus, and Jesus spoke to him like a human being. He restored Bartimaeus’ sight, and Bartimaeus joined him on the way.
 
In that whole encounter, the kingdom of God was revealed.
 
We’ve been hearing Jesus’ preaching for weeks now about life in God’s kingdom. We heard Jesus tell a rich man that eternal life means loving God and loving people here in this life. We heard Jesus teach his disciples that serving others, not ruling over them, but serving others, is greatness in God’s kingdom. Love God and love people, and let everything else flow from there.
 
So, when Bartimaeus asked for healing, Jesus continued his teaching about eternal life and God’s kingdom by showing the people what love God and love people is like. Those in the crowd who saw themselves as above Bartimaeus were turned into Bartimaeus’ servants. Jesus sent them to give Bartimaeus the message that Jesus was calling for him. The crowd became like a servant in a household who would call to the master of the house, letting him know that someone had arrived.
 
Jesus let the people become servants, rather than the important people they saw themselves as, and by giving them that servant role, Jesus helped heal the crowd, letting them live the life of the kingdom of God. Love God and love people. Through love God and love people, Jesus gave Bartimaeus and the crowd the eternal life of love in God’s kingdom.
 
Now, I’m going to guess a couple things here. One, that eternal life of the kingdom of God sounds lovely; it sounds great to me, I’m guessing it sounds great to others. Two, I’m also guessing that, as lovely as it is, the image and feeling of the kingdom of God will quickly fade, and we’ll end up back with contempt, maybe contempt for those like Bartimaeus whom we see as beneath us, maybe contempt for the crowds who see us as beneath them.
 
Like the beauty of a sunset, we’re captivated and awed by the images of the

kingdom of God, and then like a sunset, the beauty fades, and we are brought into the dark of night.
 
Then, it is easy for us to have contempt, especially for the crowd. Forgetting the beauty of God’s kingdom, let’s face it, it’s fun to be right and righteous. Having contempt for the crowd feels right and righteous. Having contempt for those around us whom we see as the crowd feels right and righteous. Don’t they deserve our contempt?
 
I imagine Bartimaeus having contempt for the crowd. It does feel like they deserved it. He had been living the violence of looking out for me alone because of their indifference to him and their contempt of him. It was Bartimaeus against the world, or the world against Bartimaeus. His life was me against the world, a life of darkness and contempt. I imagine him being exhausted, drained of life.
 
The struggle of waking up to a world of darkness, not his blindness, but the darkness of him against everyone and everyone against him. That darkness drains the life from people. Me against the world saps us of our humanity. Struggle, fear, anger, with no one in your corner. Little or no trust. Little or no joy. That’s the life of me against the world, the darkness of night when the beauty of the kingdom of God fades.  
 
I can imagine Bartimaeus still having contempt for the crowd even once his sight was restored. He could have still felt that it was he against the world, but Jesus helped heal his heart of contempt before he healed his blindness. Bringing the crowd into Bartimaeus’ healing, allowing them to be Bartimaeus’ servants, Jesus allowed healing of contempt, restoring not just sight, but the beauty of that sunset of eternal life in the kingdom of God.
 
As a result, when his sight was restored, Bartimaeus followed Jesus on the way. They walked off into the sunset of the kingdom of God. The eternal life of the kingdom of God in this story of healing. Jesus healed the crowd. Then Jesus healed Bartimaeus, not primarily of blindness. Jesus healed Bartimaeus of isolation. He healed him of me against the world.
 
From the darkness of isolation and contempt, of violence and anger, Jesus brought both Bartimaeus and the crowd around him to the eternal life of love God and love people. From the dark of night, Jesus brought the crowd and Bartimaeus the beautiful, and healing sunset of life in the kingdom of God.

Eternal Life Is for After We Die, and other Ridiculous Things Preachers Say

The Rev. Brad Sullivan
Lord of the Streets, Houston

October 13, 2024
Proper 23, B
Amos 5:6-7,10-15
Psalm 90:12-17
Mark 10:17-31

“What must I do to inherit eternal life?” That’s what the man in today’s gospel story asked Jesus. Of course he buttered him up a bit first, calling him “good teacher.” Maybe he was just being polite, but he also seems a little bit smarmy to me, like he was trying to butter Jesus up a bit to prove that he really was worthy of eternal life, that he really would get the best of everything. It seems that this man’s only real interest was himself and getting into God’s good graces.

Notice that his initial question was totally selfish. “What must I do to inherit eternal life?” He wasn’t interested in helping bring about the Kingdom of God here on earth. He wasn’t interested in healing the wounds of the world. 

No, his only interest was himself. “How can I make sure things turn out as well as they possibly can for me…and only me?” He asked. “I’ve got enormous riches, I have no interest in helping others, and I want to make sure I have the best of everything after this life too.” Like I said, kinda smarmy. Selfish.

Of course, wanting to be worthy of God’s rewards and wanting to inherit goodness for himself, that probably went along with what he’d been taught. Keep God happy with you. Make sure to follow all the rules just right so you don’t make God angry. If others aren’t following God’s rules, make sure to stay away from them so you don’t get defiled by them. Look out for you and yours. Follow the laws, and God will reward you. Sound kinda familiar to some?

The trouble is, such a selfish way of life is completely misunderstanding scripture; misunderstanding the laws of God; and misunderstanding salvation, eternal life, and the kingdom of God.

Making sure things turn out well for me is not the way of the Kingdom of God. Making sure things turn out well for me is not inheriting eternal life. Making sure things turn out well for me is not, in fact, salvation.

Eternal life, the kingdom of God, and salvation itself are “Love God, and love people.” Anything that helps you do that is following the ways of God. Anything that helps you love God and love people is inheriting eternal life. See, eternal life is the life of God, and when we love God and love people, we are living the eternal life of God. If any want to inherit eternal life, love God and love people, and you’ll find that you are living the eternal life of God here and now.

For the man asking Jesus about what he needed to do to inherit eternal life, he seems to have been thinking about life later on, after life here on earth. He somehow had the life of God detached from this life. He seems to have had the ridiculous notion that life here on earth is just setting us up for something better or worse later on, as though the only point of this life is the next life. Does that also sound familiar to some? That’s insane. The point of this life is this life and how well we love God and love others in this life.

We were made to be people of love. We were made to be people who support one another and care for one another. We were made to care for the earth, this beautiful home God has given us.

You may have heard a song called, “Made to Worship,” with a chorus which begins with, “You and I were made to worship.” My response in hearing that chorus has always been, “No we weren’t,” because I thought the song was saying that we were made for the purpose of being in churches singing to God. That sounds to me like we were made to make God happy be stroking his ego. If I’m religious enough, God will be happy with me and will reward me. That’s insane. That’s not what we were made to do.

So, when I was preparing this sermon, I thought of the song “Made to Worship” as an example of religion gone crazy, and then I looked at the rest of the lyrics, and it’s actually talking about living the kingdom of God.  “You and I were made to worship; you and I are called to love; you and I are forgiven and free. You and I embrace surrender; you and I choose to believe, then you and I will see who we were meant to be.”

Loving others. Accepting and surrendering to God’s forgiveness and the freedom God gives, choosing to believe in God and in God’s ways, despite them not always making sense to us…by doing those things, the songs says, we will see who we were meant to be. We’ll see that we were meant to be people of love. Our worship is meant to help us understand that above all, God desires us to love one another, and then when we do, we find that love to be our true worship of God.

Now, when the man asked Jesus about inheriting eternal life, Jesus responded that the man’s wealth was getting in the way of him loving God and loving people.

“What are you talking about, Jesus, I can have as much wealth as I want. There ain’t no law against it.” True, there’s no specific law against having great wealth, but Jesus’ teaching asks us, “Does what you’re doing help you to love God and to love people, or does what you’re doing make loving God and loving people harder?”

For the man who asked Jesus about inheriting eternal life, his great wealth was making loving God and loving people harder for him. We know this because when Jesus suggested that he sell some of his stuff and give the proceeds to the poor, he walked away from Jesus. He loved his stuff more than he loved people in need. Love God and love people was eclipsed by, “But I really love my stuff.”

Jesus taught that even though there ain’t no law against having as much money as you want, the reason one would have all that wealth is to care for other people, to love God by loving people. Jesus told a parable of a wealthy landowner, who paid everyone who worked for him a full, living wage. Even folks who were only able to work for an hour got a full living wage.

The man in Jesus’ parable had more than enough, and he had love in his heart so that what he did with his stuff was to make sure others had enough as well, not just enough to barely scrape by, but truly enough. Using his wealth to make sure that even those who could only work an hour had a living wage, that was his worship. That was inheriting and living eternal life, not in some after-we’re-dead future, but right then and there, because his life wasn’t bound up in his money, his stuff, for his sake. His life was bound up in the love and care he had for others.

The man who asked Jesus about inheriting eternal life was primarily focused on himself, and any salvation this is primarily focused on things turning out well for me is ultimately not salvation but just more love of stuff. In such a false salvation the stuff we love is just ourselves, and a salvation centered on self is not eternal life; it’s just selfishness.

Jesus showed us in his life and ministry what salvation truly is, what eternal life truly is, and what the Kingdom of God truly is. “Love God and love people.” Whatever helps us love God and love people is true worship of God, and a life lived by loving God through loving people, that is eternal life.

Even When the World Tells Us Not To

Brad Sullivan

Easter Sunday

April 1, 2018

Emmanuel, Houston

John 20:1-18

Even When the World Tells Us Not To

Happy Easter y’all, as we celebrate Jesus’ resurrection, his victory over death, and the fullness of his great love for us.  I love that God joined with us even in death, and then in Jesus’ resurrection, God has shown us the full measure of his grace towards us.  We get to share in his eternal life and love, forgiveness and reconciliation. 

That’s the nuts and bolts of our faith, we get to share in God’s eternal life and love, forgiveness and reconciliation.  I absolutely love our faith, our faith in Jesus and in his resurrection, and I also keep hearing more and more folks who nowadays think we’re kinda nuts for believing in Jesus, or even for believing in a God at all, and that’s fine.  To be fair, I don’t know if our faith is true; I can’t prove it, but I love it, and I choose to believe.  We choose to believe that there is a God who made us and loves us, frees us and redeems us.  We choose to believe that despite our brokenness, God will never quit on us.  That is what Jesus’ resurrection means.

God will never quit on us, and yet believing that, we still tend to quit on each other with a fair amount of regularity.  I know Lent is over y’all, but such is our condition, our lot in life, that we tend to quit on each other, which is why we need Jesus’ grace and resurrection life in the first place.  We start off liking one another and then, we often end up stopping our relationships or letting them slip away.  Sometimes it feels like we’re supposed to quit each other for various reasons, such as the insurmountable problems and irreconcilable differences that we face like how we voted in any one single election, our beliefs about those whom we think God may or may not be pleased, how we choose to spend our money, raise our kids, or even how we dress.  These are some of the insurmountable barriers that we raise and differences that we face for which we end up quitting each other.

Some in the world may say that division over these differences is ok, but Jesus not so much.  We’ve always had differences, reasons why we choose to erect barriers between ourselves and others, but God shows in Jesus’ resurrection that he loves us for who we are, and he wants us to love each other for who we are.  Republican.  Democrat.  Lesbian.  Gay.  Bisexual. Transgender.  Queer.  Atheist.  Muslim.  Jew.  Christian.  Fundamentalist.  Conservative.  Liberal.  Radical.  Black.  White.  Latino.  Asian.  Legal.  Illegal.  Tree hugging, gun loving, gluten free, home-school, hippie.    

We have so many labels now, we have a hard time even coming up with enough words to accurately label everyone we see.  Maybe that’s a good thing.  Maybe that will force us to love each other based on grace and Jesus’ love and resurrection, rather than just by seeming similar enough with some folks to kinda like each other ok.  Jesus was raised from the dead to reconcile us to God and each other.   His final commandment to his disciples was to love one another, regardless of our stripes, our skin, our labels, our ethnicity, sexuality, beliefs, or legal status.  Middle class, high class, low class, no class?  “Love one another,” Jesus said. 

People are starving for love, even for an ounce of love.  People are going to go where they are loved and accepted.  Jesus’ resurrection says, “you are loved and accepted,” and yet people often don’t feel loved and accepted in the church, and so they go elsewhere for love and acceptance.  We’ve seen this happening as people are leaving the church in droves.  Ideologies?  Beliefs?  Various social activities?  Folks can adapt pretty well to many different beliefs, so long as they are loved, and people will stay where they are loved.  I’ve often heard adults say they are no longer sure about the faith, but they love the people and community of their church and so they stay.  I think Jesus is ok with that. 

Lack of faith?  Unsure about Jesus and his resurrection?  No problem.  A loving community can hold a person through doubts and lack of faith.  Hopelessness?  We can hold a hopeless person in love, and their hope can be restored.  That’s why above all else, Jesus commanded us to love each other. That is why Paul wrote that love is greater even than faith and hope, why John wrote that we cannot claim to love God if we do not love each other. 

Jesus commanded that we love one another as he loved us, as he loved his disciples. He loved them so much that the first thing he did once he was raised from the dead was to talk to Mary, assure her that he was alive, and to have her spread the good news to the rest of his disciples.  Jesus loved his disciples and loves us to the end, and that is the gospel news for us - however messed up we are, Jesus keeps on loving us, and it’s really not because we’re perfect or even good enough.  Think about how often Jesus could have and maybe even should have chosen to quit his disciples, get rid of them, and start over with some better ones.

Jesus was transfigured before them, and Peter pipes up, “Hey Jesus - let’s make some booths!”  “Seriously Pete, that’s your response?  Yeah, ok, we’re done, just um, you stay here, build a transfiguration theme park, something like that.  I’m outta here.”

Then there was the time James and John said, “Um, Jesus, we know you’re busy with this whole upcoming death thing, whatever that is, but we want to sit at your right and left hand when you’re all powerful and glorious in majesty.  We kinda think we deserve it.”

“Oh, so you’ve been listening intently to all that I’ve been saying and teaching over the years.  You’ve really taken none of it in at all.  Great.  Tell you what, go to the next town over, about 4 miles away. Get a couple of chairs so you can sit on either side of me, and we’ll wait right here.  No, don’t dawdle, just go and do not look back.”

What about everyone else, the sex workers and thieves, the refuse of society with whom Jesus so often hung out?  “Yeah, you guys are really disgusting and foul, I think I’m just going to leave.”

Jesus didn’t do that.  He stuck with them.  Just like God keeps staying with us and choosing to love us.  Despite our continued brokenness, God sticks with us.  That’s the resurrection life, which Jesus invites us to share.  Do the hard work of continuing to choose to stay together, and do the hard work of continuing to die daily to self so that you can share in his resurrection, not because people are perfect or even good enough, but just because people are, and just because you can choose to love one another.  In Jesus’ resurrection, he shows us that we can love and forgive each other; it’s ok.  We’re allowed to, and we need to.   

We need love.  That’s what Jesus resurrection is ultimately all about, God’s unwavering love for us.  God is love, and love how Jesus wants us to be with each other.  That’s the resurrection life.  We are Jesus’ beloved, the one’s for whom he sent Mary to say, “Jesus is raised from the dead,” and so we get to keep loving each other as he loves us.  Even the weirdoes and the uber conservatives.  Even the crazy hippie liberals and straight laced conformists.  Even the sex workers and thieves.  It is ok for us to love those whom others may feel are unlovable.  It is ok for us to love each other despite how messed up we all are.  It is ok for us to believe in Jesus and find hope in his resurrection.  We get to do that despite what others may say.  Who cares if people think we’re nuts?  Our faith tells us to love each other.  Jesus sticks with us and wants us to stick with each other, to share in the joy and the love of his resurrection.  We have his permission to do so, even if the world tells us not to.  

Love Is Gritty, Love Is Hard, Love Is an Empty Tomb

Brad Sullivan

7 Easter, Year A

May 28, 2017

Emmanuel, Houston

John 17:1-11

Love Is Gritty, Love Is Hard, Love Is an Empty Tomb

I had a conversation with a nine year old last week about this Sunday’s gospel passage.  I read it to him and then asked him what he thought.  He said that it sounded like Jesus and the Father saying, “If we get to be in heaven for ever, why don’t the people on earth get to?”  Meaning, “why shouldn’t the people on earth get to be with us in heaven forever as well?”, and of course, we do.  That was Jesus’ life’s work and his prayer for his disciples which we heard today, that they would be one and he and the Father are one. 

The Father, and the Son, and the (not mentioned in this passage) Holy Spirit want us to be one with them and each other just as they are one.  There’s nothing better in the world, nothing better in all of the universes than the unity of Jesus and the Father and that’s the unity Jesus is praying for us to have!  That unity with each other and unity with God is being with God in heaven forever, and I don’t mean because we have unity with God, then we’ll get to be with God in heaven forever.  I mean having unity with God and each other is right now being in heaven with God forever. 

Heaven is all around us.  The Kingdom of God, the Kingdom of Heaven is here, now, in the very air we breathe, for in God we live and move and have our being.  Jesus was praying for our unity with each other and God now, for eternal life now.  “And this is eternal life, that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent.”  Knowing Jesus, following in his way, believing in him is eternal life, lived in this world, in this life, and continued on after death, in the next life, for there is nothing better in the world, nothing better in all of the universes than the unity of Jesus and the Father, and that’s the unity Jesus is praying for us to have!

At the same time that Jesus was praying for his disciples, praying for us, however, did you notice how much he was talking about himself?  Glorify me so that I may glorify you?  Much of John’s Gospel has Jesus talking about himself.  There is very little teaching about God’s kingdom, few moral lessons, no parables…almost all of Jesus’ teaching involves an explanation about who he is and why people need to believe in him.  “I am one with the Father, I am the good shepherd, I am the vine, I am so humble and yet so awesome.”  Ok, that last one was made up; in John’s Gospel, we don’t get the humble, self-effacing Jesus we see in Mathew, Mark, and Luke.  Jesus is constantly talking about himself and kinda saying how great he is.  This is a bit of a side bar, but John’s Jesus often sounds to a bit to me like the rapper Eminem in the rap song Without Me:  “This looks like a job for me, so everybody, just follow me, cause we need a little controversy, and it feels so empty without me.”

I realize in saying that, I just secured about 7 more years for myself in purgatory, comparing Jesus and Eminem, (he’s a child of God), but  often, as I read John’s Gospel, I am struck by how much Jesus sounds like a rapper rapping about himself.  Rappers that I have heard tend to rap about themselves especially early on in their careers, as if to introduce themselves:  “here’s who I am, here’s my story, here’s why I’m legitimate and worth your listening to, and here’s the story within me that is screaming to get out.”

That’s kinda what Jesus was doing in John’s Gospel.  Jesus was constantly telling people about who he was, how great he was, and how much they needed to believe in him.  Of course that’s what he was doing, because of who Jesus was and because there were so many false narratives out there about life and about God.  The narrative about Jesus was screaming to get out of him.  The narrative about what life truly is, about who God truly is was screaming to get out of Jesus, and he only had that one life, that one chance to tell the narrative of God, the narrative of love.

Jesus had one chance, and he didn’t want to blow it, so he taught people how to live, how to love, he taught about God’s kingdom, he showed them what life was like in God’s kingdom so they could live out God’s kingdom, and he taught about himself, because at the heart of God’s kingdom is Jesus.  The heart and soul of God’s kingdom is the new Eden, the new creation where we walk with God and each other, naked and unashamed, and the heart and soul of that new Eden is Jesus.

So Jesus did talk about himself because he wanted everyone to know and share in the eternal life  of the new Eden which is unity with him and the Father. Remember, there is nothing better in the world, nothing better in all of the universes than the unity of Jesus and the Father, and that’s the unity Jesus was praying for us to have!

That unity, known by another word is love, and not just sappy, hallmarky, pop song love.  Love is the cross.  That’s where Jesus was going just after the prayer he prayed for his disciples.  Love is sacrifice for the sake of the beloved.  Love is gritty; love is hard; love is not pouty or jealous, boastful or rude.  It makes a way for the beloved; it does the hard work of seeking peace and working through resentment.  Love does not rejoice in wrongdoing; love repents of wrongdoing and seeks to heal past hurts.  Love rejoices in kindness and truth, and love prefers having a good relationship to just being right.  Love bears the good times and hardships.  Love believes in the beloved.  Love makes its home in hope, and love endures all things for the sake of the beloved. 

Love goes to the cross for the sake of the beloved.  Love kneels at the foot of the cross to mourn for the beloved.  Love is tears and joy.  Love is laughter and pain.  Love is sticking by the beloved through sickness and death.  Love is caring about someone through their anxieties, doubts, and fears.  Love is not wanting more and more, not demanding what is deserved, but being content with enough so that another can also have enough. 

Love is also an empty tomb.  Love is new life, new creation.  Love is joy in each new day, each new moment.  Love is setting aside the past to be made new in the present.  Love is trusting in Jesus’ resurrection, trusting in his narrative about God, and life, and himself.  Love is eternal life, knowing God and Jesus Christ whom he sent. There is nothing greater in all the world, nothing greater in all of the universes than love, and love is the unity of Jesus and the Father, the unity and gritty kind of love that Jesus is praying for us to have, for us to be in heaven forever with him and the Father.