Mercy. Letting People Be. God Is With Us.

The Rev. Brad Sullivan
Lord of the Streets, Houston
December 21, 2025
4 Advent, A
Isaiah 7:10-16
Psalm 80:1-7, 16-18
Matthew 1:18-25

When Mary ended up pregnant with a baby that wasn’t Joseph’s, he could have called for Mary’s death. Such was his right under Jewish law in Deuteronomy 22:23-27. Mary could have been stoned to death for being pregnant because she was engaged. Even if she had been raped, if she hadn’t screamed out loudly enough for someone to hear and stop the rape, she still could have been killed. We don’t know how often such killings took place in 1st century Israel, but we do know that Joseph had every right to have Mary killed. Some might even say he had a responsibility to fulfil the righteousness of the law, to have Mary killed. Joseph decided to go a different way.

He and Mary were probably both in their early teens, their marriage arranged by their parents, with Joseph and Mary still living with their parents at the time. So, when he found out she was pregnant with someone else’s baby, he could have, at the very least, called off the wedding. That was, in fact, what he planned to do. He would tell Mary’s family that since she was no longer a virgin and had been impregnated by another man, he would no longer accept her as his wife. 

Had that played out, Mary would have likely continued living with her parents. She would have had her baby. Maybe one day she would have gotten married, though her prospects for security and a husband weren’t that great. 

Then, of course, Joseph was visited by an Angel of the Lord who told him to take Mary as his wife because the child was given to her by the Holy Spirit, not by another man. Now, when Matthew wrote this story of Jesus birth, we find that it reminded Matthew of Isaiah 7:10-16, where the young woman gave birth to a son and the son was named, “Immanuel,” meaning God is with us.

Reminding us of that story, Matthew was telling us that God is with us in the birth of Jesus. God was with Mary as he chose her to become pregnant with Jesus and to raise him as her beloved son. God was with Joseph as he assured Joseph of his plan, that the pregnancy was God’s doing. God was also with Joseph before the angel visited him, when Joseph chose to let Mary go quietly.

If Joseph had had Mary killed, he would have fulfilled the letter of the law, but he would have missed God being with us, not to mention murdering an innocent young woman. Instead, Joseph chose to let Mary be, and God is with us.

God was with Mary when Joseph chose to simply let her go, rather than enforce upon her the full weight of the law. Even though she had seemingly broken the law. Even though she was engaged to him and gotten pregnant by some other dude, he thought, Joseph simply chose to let her go. 

She won’t be a part of my life, he figured, and that will be that. There had been a civil contract between his and her families, one’s daughter and one’s son, and since that contract had been broken by Mary, the two were no longer going to be married. That was all. No death. No condemnation. No public outcry. God is with us.

Now again, some would say he should have publicly disgraced Mary. She had done wrong, and they needed to keep Israel pure from such immorality. How could they be God’s people if they allowed such terrible behavior as Mary the tramp getting knocked up by some random dude? If they allowed that, how could God be with them? If they allowed Mary and others like her to live, wouldn’t they be making God angry with them as a nation? How could God be with them if they did not follow God’s laws of purity and sexual morality?

That could have been Joseph’s response, but again, he went a different way. Joseph chose mercy, and as it turns out, God was with them because of that mercy. God is with us because of that mercy.

So, trusting that God is with us, even when people do things that are considered unrighteous and immoral, how might we follow the example of Joseph? How might we show mercy, too?

Well, Joseph thought Mary had committed sexual immorality, and we have laws being proposed and passed aimed at what some consider to be sexual immorality. I am thinking of our LGBTQ brothers and sisters who are being targeted by laws written to uphold some people’s ideas of Christian sexual morality. Repealing marriage equality. Preventing doctors from helping transgender people transition. What if, instead of writing laws against our LGBTQ brothers and sisters, people just let them be?    

I’ve heard concern by some Christian preachers that God is angry with the United States for allowing LGBTQ people to have the same rights and freedoms as everyone else. That’s kinda like thinking Mary had to be killed to keep God from being angry with Israel. Turns out, despite what the law said, God wanted mercy, not murder.

Well, if we look to Joseph, his righteousness came not by enforcing the punishment of God’s law. Josephs’ righteousness came by showing mercy. Joseph’s righteousness came by simply letting Mary be. What if people who consider LGBTQ folks to be sinners just let them be, trusting that God is with us. 

What if Christians in general didn’t force their ideas of morality on others, but simply let people be? Could we still trust that God is with us? That would be following Joseph’s example of righteousness, showing mercy, trusting that God is with us.

What about other ways that people might show mercy, trusting God is with us, rather than enforcing punishment for doing wrong? What about when we lose our tempers, wanting to shout at or fight with someone because they did something against us? We’re so pissed off, and we want to teach the, to make them know they were wrong, to admit it, and to make it right. We want punishment and justice.

That is presumably what an 18-year-old wanted when he stabbed his 16-year-old classmate in the neck, killing him. The 18-year-old couldn’t find his vape pen and was convinced the younger man had taken it. A fight ensued and because of that, one young man is dead, and the other is in jail, facing murder charges and decades in prison. 

I don’t know what was going through his head at the time, but it’s a good bet it wasn’t mercy. A $21 vape pen, an assumption of theft, no mercy, and a young man is dead. That’s what could have happened to Mary. An engagement, an assumption of adultery, no mercy, and Mary would have been killed, but Joseph chose a different way, and God is with us.

Joseph choosing mercy was probably not an accident. He had probably been shown mercy himself, had been taught mercy. Vengeance is easy. All we have to do is listen to our emotions, get hurt, get upset, and do exactly what our emotions tell us to do. That’s what Cain did when he killed Abel. Be angry and do exactly what that anger says to do. That’s what Derek Chauvin did when he murdered George Floyd.

Vengeance is easy, and vengeance tends to rest on the idea that we’re alone. Vengeance is a fearful response that we have to take care of whatever problem ourselves. Judgment, justice, all up to us. Vengeance can also be a fearful response that if we don’t hurt the people we think are wrong, then God may hurt us. Neither of those were Joseph’s response. Joseph chose mercy and found that God is with us.

Mercy is taught and practiced. Mercy takes trust that God is with us, and so we don’t need vengeance. 

For the young man who killed his classmate over a missing vape pen, mercy does mean that he’ll need to be in prison if he’s convicted, and that he’ll need to be shown mercy when he’s there, helped to heal, not just beaten down and punished forever.

God is with us. Always and everywhere. God became human so we would know that he is with us. God became human to show us mercy. Mercy helps heal the world. May we follow Joseph’s example. May we follow the way of God. May we show mercy.